Lester Who

Parking at car dealerships.  New cars over here, used over there and customer parking in the front… where do I park?  Where do I belong?  Eventually, I find a group of misfit automobiles: cars from other dealerships, vans with license plates and trucks with mesh hats sitting on the dashboards.  Once inside, Snookie meets me for my 9am employee introduction seminar. She begins by setting me up with instructions that do not fit my job description. By the time she’s through with a lengthy introduction to sales, I inform her that I’m working with the company’s “internet stuff.” Regardless, she hands me a sales uniform. “You’ll need 5 shirts and normally we charge salesmen half price for each shirt, but I’ll give you this set for free if you don’t tell anyone,” she tells me. “I work with computers, though,” I tell Snookie, “Do the non-sales employees have pay for their shirts?”  “No,” Snookie says, “employees who don’t make a commission get their shirts for free.”  “Great!” I exclaim, “so I wouldn’t be paying for the shirts in the first place?” “Well normally you would have to because these are uniforms for salespeople,” Snookie says. I inform her again that I’m not a salesperson and we go around the same wheel until I thank her for the free uniforms. On my way out, the sales people see a greenhorn. They’re all saying hello as if I’m the new crew member of the S.S.CarSalesMan.  Am I one of them?  Or do they just not have a uniform for me?